Just chilling with my husband at the barricade
So I bought a new printer yesterday and put all the effort into installing it last night. It wasn’t until I actually needed to print something that I realised the USB cable was missing from the packaging. Thus, I was unable to connect the said printer to my laptop and therefore was unable to print anything. So instead, I drove to uni to tend to my printing needs, only to find no more than $0.10 on my printing balance. The universe does NOT want me to print this document!
Gold Coast Turf Club for Melbourne Cup yesterday
Why did the chicken cross the road?
KINDERGARTENER - To get to the other side.
PLATO - For the greater good.
ARISTOTLE - It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX - It was a historical inevitability.
TIMOTHY LEARY - Because that’s the only trip the establishment would let it take.
SADDAM HUSSEIN - This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK - To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
HIPPOCRATES - Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. - I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
MOSES - And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, “Thou shalt cross the road.” And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
RICHARD M. NIXON - The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.
MACHIAVELLI - The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
BILL GATES - The newly released Chicken 2003, will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
DARWIN - Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.
EINSTEIN - Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference and relativity.
GEORGE BUSH - We are committed to establishing a democracy where chickens freely cross roads without oppression from terrorist organizations.